This unbound (and largely unorganized) stack of tattered papers is held together in a worn, leather book cover the title of which reads:
“Purple Musings, Green Thoughts & Rainbow Dreams”
By: Caledath Berbani, Feysworn
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Day 2 of this false slavery! Little do these foul creatures know that it is I who am the master here and that this is just the first step towards achieving my goal. Soon I shall make them all my pawns and, should they not grovel at my feet, they shall know the wrath of Caledath!
Day 257 of this false slavery! My once grandious dreams of mastery have been replaced by the daily drudgery of doing dishes, folding clothes and performing in this ridiculous “Simple Jack” play. Perhaps I should have thought about Step 2 of my grand plan before getting started….
Day 305 of this false slavery! There is so little to do in this hellhole other than work, work, work. Don’t they know that all I want to do is sing! My goodness, I think I may be a bit mentally unbalanced. Tee-hee. I think this tune in my head needs just a little more cowbell. Yes, now its perfect…..
Day 432 of this false slavery! There are precisely 6832 distinct cracks in the western wall of my cell. Shall I count them again? One, two, three…What is that racket outside my room?
Day 432.5 - It’s a sunshine day!!!!!!! Free at last!!! I wish my Mistress (what was her name again?) could have sent a better looking bunch. A dwarven chef? A walking bicep? Surely I deserve something more dignified than this group. Oh well at least I can finish that thing I was supposed to do. Hmmm…..
Day 440 – So much blood. That spatter looks like a butterfly, that one like a tree and that one like my dog Old Feller (may he rest in peace). At least my tormentors are no more. My new companions have indeed proven to be useful. Perhaps I shall allow them to accompany me for a time.
Day 450 – Paldimar. Was he the one? I hope not because now he’s dead. Not just a little dead mind you but the kind of dead you don’t come back from. My colleagues may not be pretty but they are effective. Now why do I have a sudden taste for snails?
Day 453 – We’ve been invited to a celebration this evening. Hopefully I can finish my song before then. If I could only finish this line - We’re gonna party like….. it’s Hammer Time? A tribe of butterflies? 3.1415? No, no, no….
Day 453.5 – Worst. Party. Ever.
Day 455 – Why can’t I remember what I was supposed to do????
Day 456 – Heading off with my peeps to the Museum of Karavakos. I love Museums!
Day 458 - Met one of Martouk's sons but he died. Bummer. Now that I think of it Martouk vaguely resembles my feysworn Mistress. I wonder if we might be related?
Day 459 – I think my friends tricked me. This Museum was full of dead things but not the dead kind of dead things. The, umm, de-dead kind of things. Mummy’s, flying skulls, vampires, demi-gods, etc. I prefer it when the dead don’t move around so much. Still, the Museum was fairly interesting and I think that Sevrid was pleased that his brother is no longer dead-dead. Seems like they still have a few things to talk about.
Day 465 – We decided to visit the Mirti castle as honored guests. Kind of a gloomy place but it is nice to have my own room for a change. That dragon-dude farts a lot when he sleeps and Iä’s snoring could wake He Who Shall Not Be Named. Very excited for tonight’s dinner party - I love parties!
Day 466? – Oh my what a hangover. Not sure what that drink was but it must have been good cause this place it totally trashed. Reminds me of that time Crazy Bob stole the cow…..Anyway, where did my pals run off to….
Day 470-something – Interesting week or so. Briefly communed through portal with a God chained in the Dark Realm (I think he wanted to tell me something – must follow up). Fell through collapsed floor into cavern of talking mushroom men (thought I was crazy for a minute there). Engaged in some political intrigue worthy of the Fey court with the local power brokers. Overthrew tyranny & righted injustice. Just another day at the office. Can we please find the sun now?
Day 490 – Ah fresh air! Rainbows and butterflies abound. We have collectively (well it was really my idea) decided to take the now-vacant Mirti estate as our own. Should be easy now that its empty. Can’t wait to try and rebuild that shattered portal. The chained God seemed nice.
Day 495 – Well that was certainly depressing. Squire-boy falls in love with servant girl. Manor lord also falls in love with servant girl. Servant girl loves squire-boy. Manor lord jealous and rapes (totally uncool dude, try flowers) servant girl. Squire boy defends girls honor by dueling manor lord and has him dead to rights but nooooooo, lord pledges allegiance to dark forces, turns de-dead and kills squire boy. Servant girl kills herself. Now everyone is a ghost or undead (Iä insists this is the correct term) and of course we have to clean up the mess. Well at least it is done. Now I shall write a song to celebrate the founding of the great Duchy of Caledath.
Day 498 - For some reason the villagers don’t really seem all that excited about the new Duchy. Hopefully things will improve once we have the first annual Kravaxsar Day Fair.
Day 500 – Guess what???? Yes MOAR undead. Turns out that Mr. Mirti did this little ritual thing that made not just a few undead, but a whole shitload of undead (including Sevrid’s brother Thorvald) come attack the village. I really think those two need to see a therapist because they have some serious issues. Needless to say Lord Caledath and his royal guard succeeded in disrupting the ritual and fending off the threat. I swear if I see any more undead I will be forced to burninate something. Note – DO NOT invite Thorvald to Kravaxsar Day Fair.
“Purple Musings, Green Thoughts & Rainbow Dreams”
By: Caledath Berbani, Feysworn
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Day 2 of this false slavery! Little do these foul creatures know that it is I who am the master here and that this is just the first step towards achieving my goal. Soon I shall make them all my pawns and, should they not grovel at my feet, they shall know the wrath of Caledath!
Day 257 of this false slavery! My once grandious dreams of mastery have been replaced by the daily drudgery of doing dishes, folding clothes and performing in this ridiculous “Simple Jack” play. Perhaps I should have thought about Step 2 of my grand plan before getting started….
Day 305 of this false slavery! There is so little to do in this hellhole other than work, work, work. Don’t they know that all I want to do is sing! My goodness, I think I may be a bit mentally unbalanced. Tee-hee. I think this tune in my head needs just a little more cowbell. Yes, now its perfect…..
Day 432 of this false slavery! There are precisely 6832 distinct cracks in the western wall of my cell. Shall I count them again? One, two, three…What is that racket outside my room?
Day 432.5 - It’s a sunshine day!!!!!!! Free at last!!! I wish my Mistress (what was her name again?) could have sent a better looking bunch. A dwarven chef? A walking bicep? Surely I deserve something more dignified than this group. Oh well at least I can finish that thing I was supposed to do. Hmmm…..
Day 440 – So much blood. That spatter looks like a butterfly, that one like a tree and that one like my dog Old Feller (may he rest in peace). At least my tormentors are no more. My new companions have indeed proven to be useful. Perhaps I shall allow them to accompany me for a time.
Day 450 – Paldimar. Was he the one? I hope not because now he’s dead. Not just a little dead mind you but the kind of dead you don’t come back from. My colleagues may not be pretty but they are effective. Now why do I have a sudden taste for snails?
Day 453 – We’ve been invited to a celebration this evening. Hopefully I can finish my song before then. If I could only finish this line - We’re gonna party like….. it’s Hammer Time? A tribe of butterflies? 3.1415? No, no, no….
Day 453.5 – Worst. Party. Ever.
Day 455 – Why can’t I remember what I was supposed to do????
Day 456 – Heading off with my peeps to the Museum of Karavakos. I love Museums!
Day 458 - Met one of Martouk's sons but he died. Bummer. Now that I think of it Martouk vaguely resembles my feysworn Mistress. I wonder if we might be related?
Day 459 – I think my friends tricked me. This Museum was full of dead things but not the dead kind of dead things. The, umm, de-dead kind of things. Mummy’s, flying skulls, vampires, demi-gods, etc. I prefer it when the dead don’t move around so much. Still, the Museum was fairly interesting and I think that Sevrid was pleased that his brother is no longer dead-dead. Seems like they still have a few things to talk about.
Day 465 – We decided to visit the Mirti castle as honored guests. Kind of a gloomy place but it is nice to have my own room for a change. That dragon-dude farts a lot when he sleeps and Iä’s snoring could wake He Who Shall Not Be Named. Very excited for tonight’s dinner party - I love parties!
Day 466? – Oh my what a hangover. Not sure what that drink was but it must have been good cause this place it totally trashed. Reminds me of that time Crazy Bob stole the cow…..Anyway, where did my pals run off to….
Day 470-something – Interesting week or so. Briefly communed through portal with a God chained in the Dark Realm (I think he wanted to tell me something – must follow up). Fell through collapsed floor into cavern of talking mushroom men (thought I was crazy for a minute there). Engaged in some political intrigue worthy of the Fey court with the local power brokers. Overthrew tyranny & righted injustice. Just another day at the office. Can we please find the sun now?
Day 490 – Ah fresh air! Rainbows and butterflies abound. We have collectively (well it was really my idea) decided to take the now-vacant Mirti estate as our own. Should be easy now that its empty. Can’t wait to try and rebuild that shattered portal. The chained God seemed nice.
Day 495 – Well that was certainly depressing. Squire-boy falls in love with servant girl. Manor lord also falls in love with servant girl. Servant girl loves squire-boy. Manor lord jealous and rapes (totally uncool dude, try flowers) servant girl. Squire boy defends girls honor by dueling manor lord and has him dead to rights but nooooooo, lord pledges allegiance to dark forces, turns de-dead and kills squire boy. Servant girl kills herself. Now everyone is a ghost or undead (Iä insists this is the correct term) and of course we have to clean up the mess. Well at least it is done. Now I shall write a song to celebrate the founding of the great Duchy of Caledath.
Day 498 - For some reason the villagers don’t really seem all that excited about the new Duchy. Hopefully things will improve once we have the first annual Kravaxsar Day Fair.
Day 500 – Guess what???? Yes MOAR undead. Turns out that Mr. Mirti did this little ritual thing that made not just a few undead, but a whole shitload of undead (including Sevrid’s brother Thorvald) come attack the village. I really think those two need to see a therapist because they have some serious issues. Needless to say Lord Caledath and his royal guard succeeded in disrupting the ritual and fending off the threat. I swear if I see any more undead I will be forced to burninate something. Note – DO NOT invite Thorvald to Kravaxsar Day Fair.
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Posted on March 17, 2010 04:37
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